Help me unravel these songs unsung

dreams without sleep

my heart still aches

I have left so many people in my past

those who I loved and adored

who hurt too much.

thinking time was endless

and there would be enough to reconnect.

the smiles that endure

in my heart

the memories made

are all thats left.

When a soul is swept away

the oblivion that stands so long

it aches to be challangend .


words never spoken

words never heard

maybe they could have saved

a life gone too soon.

The darkness that dwelled so long in those days

like the never ending winter

where we were just recovering

from one accident

drinking ourselves into another.

The group that set us apart

let us stand together

like a never ending party

I grew up and moved out too soon.

One hit is all it takes till death curls up in bed

sucking your last breath

leaving your children lost.

leaving all those that shared this life

without a friend.

I steped away to save myself

to save my children.

I am reminded with each passing obituary

how much we all meant to each other.

now matter how much time passes

the wounds never healed

I wonder, if  I had stepped up sooner

would that have changed anything?

The light of potential had shown in our eyes

we hid with careless disguise

now our children are our benifactors.

Life choice that never cease to unravel

our latest mistake

Harder my being/ Soul love saga

Harder My Being
You don’t understand
My experiences.
You underestimate
my being-
I had to take a stand
I’ve been-
To everyone I meet.

MY soul is taller
And darker
Than your shadow
On a totally eclipse of the night.

My hearts been broken
To pieces of compassion.
This worlds my addiction
Slowly killing me.
I m a lost cause

Set my mind free from what I have seen
Fly hard

I love to hurt/In the beguining / soul love saga

I love to hurt
Love has been a terrible thing
It makes you hate
It makes you sing
It makes friend ships sink
Sometimes it brings people to merge lives.
Sometimes it tears lives apart.
Love and liars

I love to hurt
love patients is needed when love is here
never fear
Waiting around the corner
Love is a never ending story
Bringing tears to my eyes
Of joy and hate
Tears that still have no color
when you fall out of love

I want to feel free
like the many a nights
that I walked these familiar streets
I’ve ran with the moon the stars and the air
openly surrounding me
with only a small price to pay
Experiencing only the highs of life
with the lowest outcomes
having that freedom
erased my worries
As I escaped reality ,
stumbling away.
Constantly changing and adapting
learnin my own true being
new dedication
owed to myself,
time to regain
energy to continue in this life.

imbolic winter morning

Given a little more love and effort

Crowningshield's Blog

I cherish these quiet mornings.

Before the kids wake up and everyone is asleep.

Nestled in their blankets warm

on a cold winters day.

I use to resist the urge

but came flying out of my bed

to tell my story.

Maybe I crawled between

the kids sprawled like a litter of kittens

more because I was lonely.

My dreams were lying again.

Waking up with no arms around me.

Without my friend to make me laugh

or share that drink.

Either way

I am here.

listening to the The bubbling of the phishtank

and the humm of the coffee pot.

Keeping my vital essence  caffine

dripping at 200 degree’s perfect.

I will be ready for an iv in a few (just a tired moms joke)

Today is the day

I let love win

or let it in.

Can I just let it in?

Open the door to my dreams?


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